Coriolanus

tags: drama, revenge, Shakespeare adaptation
goose egg

• The citizens of Rome are hungry. Coriolanus, the hero of Rome, a great soldier and a man of inflexible self-belief despises the people. His extreme views ignite a mass riot. Rome is bloody. Manipulated and out-maneuvered by politicians and even his own mother Volumnia, Coriolanus is banished from Rome. He offers his life or his services to his sworn enemy Tullus Aufidius.
  - Written by Icon Entertainment

Shakespeare gone Occupy Wall Street. That's not the reason I think the movie belongs to the UGLY category. Modern setting of a Shakespeare play is usually fine with me, but this one definitely is not. The setting and the script adapted to Shakespearean language don't work together and I suspect even the best stage and film actors will not be able to perform well. 

Both RafeRafe (Coriolanus) and Gerry (Aufidius) are awful here. Ralph out-overacted every hammy veteran as well as newbie stage actor in any Shakespearean movie I have ever watched. It's funny and at the same time irritating when he delivers reeeaaally long lines during battle. The enemy would have killed him and his men while he is busy emoting out there. Gerald Butler has this confused facial expression while sounding like he's reading his lines, complete with thick Scottish accent. Such a bad actor. Early in the movie, the two enemies meet and Ralph, the director, decided they should put down their weapons for a hand to hand combat. Big mistake. The fight was laughable because they obviously were not trained properly. They look like ageing fake wrestlers. Utterly pathetic. With their budget, the producers should have at least hired a professional to teach them how to fight or added CGI so as not to make them look lame.

Not recommended.

Thermæ Romæ

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Thermæ Romæ
tags: ancient Rome, comedy, Japanese, time-travel, zany

from IMDB

• Ancient Roman architect Lucius is too serious. His inability to keep up with the fast-moving times costs him his job. When a friend takes the dejected Lucius to the public bathhouse to cheer him up, Lucius accidentally slips through time and resurfaces in a modern-day public bath in Japan. There, he meets aspiring young manga artist Mami, along with others of the "flat-faced clan". Shocked by the many inventive aspects of Japan's bathing culture, Lucius returns to ancient Rome and garners tremendous attention when he implements these novel ideas back in Rome. As he time-slips back and forth between ancient Rome and modern-day Japan, Lucius' reputation as the ingenious, new bath architect begins to grow.
  - Written by Production

The zany hilarious movie is based on a manga series. The main Roman characters, including Emperor Hadrian, are all played by Japanese actors and the movie is entirely in Japanese. Lucius speaks occasionally in Latin to the present day Japanese which adds to the goofiness of the movie. The soundtrack with several operatic arias is also a great addition to the movie.     

Some of the ideas from present-day Japanese bathing rituals and equipment Lucius brought to ancient Rome:
wash basins
fruit-flavored yogurt drink
head shields to use when shampooing hair
mural of Mt. Vesuvius 
massaging bubble jet a la Jacuzzi, but powered by slaves
natural hot springs

The DVD is available on Amazon; streaming is not available on both Amazon and Netflix. 

  

Supernatural Season 10 Preview

Dean is having fun as a demon. October 7 can't come soon enough. The song is Figure It Out by Royal Blood.

Fifty Shades Of Grey

  tags: avoid, erotica-ish, garbage, worst book of all time

2 thumbs down, all the way down

Book Description from Amazon.com

When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.
Shocked yet thrilled by Grey’s singular erotic tastes, Ana hesitates. For all the trappings of success—his multinational businesses, his vast wealth, his loving family—Grey is a man tormented by demons and consumed by the need to control. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian Grey’s secrets and explores her own dark desires.

The movie based on this atrocious book undeserving of its massive sales and popularity, is coming out soon, hence, the write-up. I read the first installment on Kindle, borrowed from the library, 2 years ago when it was all over the internet and on Goodreads. I wanted to know what the fuss was about. I'm not into reading this genre and didn't know what the acronym BDSM was and had to google it. I'm not against this genre, it's just not entertaining or "stimulating" to me. There are probably good authors for this type of books, judging from the 100 top free best sellers on Amazon but this one takes the cake in the worst writing in all genre. The author simply can't produce creative sentences, or she has the capability of a 5th grader, no offense to 5th graders. I read that this "book", if it can really be considered a book, started as a fan fiction story based on the vampire series Twilight, which I've never read nor have any interest in reading. 

The romance/love story of Ana and Christian is unbelievably stupid and the sex parts are not sexy at all, they are sometimes gross, but the most offensive is the juvenile writing. The author has no ability to be a good or even an acceptable author. She resorts to repetition of phrases, facial expressions, reactions, etc. 

Examples of her laziness or incompetence have been recorded by numerous appalled readers:   
holy shit - 65 times

holy crap - 54 times
holy fuck - 45 times

the phrase "inner goddess" - 47 times

My inner goddess is panting.
My inner goddess is going to explode.
My inner goddess has woken and is paying attention.
My inner goddess has her pom poms in hand - she’s in cheerleading mode.

To sum it up: 

Recommended reading Amazon's 1-star reviews. They are superbly written and awesomely more entertaining than the "book".

Black Lightning

tags: romance, Russian movie, super hero, thriller,



Black Lightning  is a 2009 Russian superhero film directed by Alexandr Voitinsky and Dmitry Kiseliov, and produced by Timur Bekmambetov.

Plot Summary

Moscow, 2004, and wealthy entrepreneur Kuptsov drills deep beneath the city, trying to reach a huge diamond vein. Aware that his ruthless drilling will destroy the city and its denizens, it's a result he's willing to accept for untold additional wealth. Fortunately, his equipment lacks enough power. He needs the Nano-catalyst (developed years ago) to fuel his machinery, but its current whereabouts is unknown. Meanwhile, in another part of the city, college boy Dima dreams of owning a car and dating gorgeous co-ed Nastya. His wealthy friend Max has a Mercedes Benz and is flirting with Nastya, which frustrates Dima. On his birthday, Dima finally gets a car (from his parents) - a grungy, antiquated Volga of which he is privately ashamed; but, unbeknownst to anyone, the car - the recipient of "failed" Nano-catalysis - is capable of much more, and turns Dima into an unidentified crusader of justice known as Black Lightning. Written by Claudio Carvalho, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

I find myself watching more and more foreign language movies these days - Korean, Japanese, Thai, and most recently Russian movies are my flavors-of-the-month/s. IMHO, foreign language movies are better written and acting seems natural and not forced or sounds like actors are reading a script.

This Russian movie has all the things I like in a movie: young good-looking leads (yeah, so what if I'm ageist...who wants to watch old prune-y actors like Harrison Ford, et al?), A+ script/story/acting, baddest baddies, right amount of humor and special effects, great entertainment all the way. It has a moral to the story too. Dima acting like a spoiled brat learns from a tragic experience to be more humble, accepts what is given to him, and ends up helping people with his car's super ability. Getting the girl is icing on the cake.

I can't remember how many times I've seen this movie streamed from Netflix which unfortunately is no longer available. Amazon streams for $3 to rent and $10 to purchase. This is the first movie of Grigoriy Dobrygin I've watched that eventually launched my "Idolatry" Board on Pinterest. On the very very short DVD "Extras", the pretty actress who plays our hero's love interest jokingly lamented she only had two chances to kiss Grigoriy during filming and they were very brief "one-take" shots.

Grigoriy photos

His Russian language movies currently streaming
How I Ended This Summer - Netflix and Amazon
Atomic Ivan - Amazon

Cold Fire

  tags: horror, mystery, romance, science fiction, suspense,



Book Description

Teacher Jim Ironheart, aptly named, is sent by forces unknown to save chosen people in life-threatening situations. By chance, a young but jaded reporter stumbles onto his missions, and joins him to investigate who is controlling him and why. Shared nightmares begin to point to an extraterrestrial influence, and the pair are forced to confront Ironheart's forgotten past for answers. Koontz, a master at maintaining mystery and suspense, weaves themes from earlier novels into this latest thriller. Even if the ending calls to mind DuMaurier and Hitchcock, Cold Fire contains all the ingredients--likable characters, nail-biting suspense, and above all, unlimited imagination--that will please Koontz's fans. For all popular collections. Literary Guild and Doubleday Book Club main selection; Mystery Guild featured alternate; previewed in Prepub Alert, LJ 9/1/90.-Eric W. Johnson, Teikyo Post Univ. Lib., Waterbury, Ct.Copyright 1991 Reed Business Information, Inc.

This novel came out in 2004 but somehow it escaped my attention. It's now on Kindle and it is worth the 2 days I spent reading it; didn't even notice it's 448 pages long. The book is typical Koontz: horror, supernatural, sci-fi, suspense, humor, but with an unfamiliar addition of romance which actually is not a bad thing. Without the romance angle, there won't be a story IMHO.

Highly recommended to fans of mystery/horror/sci-fi genre. Don't forget to read the Afterword section; it is funny and entertaining as well.

To atheists, tree huggers, and the easily offended - stay away as there's plenty to get your knickers in a twist.

The Kabbalistic Murder Code

 tags: mystery, thriller

Book Description from Amazon 

The Kabbalistic Murder Code is an original and innovative Israeli thriller that was written for all those having an interest in Kabbalah. It incorporates two seemingly unconnected elements: a string of strange murders and the deciphering of ancient Kabbalistic texts, along with their hidden and mystical meanings.

A professor from Jerusalem, an expert in decoding ancient Hebrew manuscripts, is hired to carry out a mysterious task, one that sends him to three continents. He becomes entangled in a web of murders that leave him deeply puzzled. However, he quickly discovers that if he does not succeed in deciphering the enigmatic manuscripts, through his in-depth knowledge of Kabbalah, the lives of many people - including his own family - will be endangered.

Interwoven within this exciting tale are curious passages reviewing the many conquests that the city of Jerusalem has endured during its long history. Their relevance and significance become clear only at the end of the book.

I like
>Elijah, the ordinary looking University lecturer, decoder, P.I.?, and his wry sense of humor
>Seamless weaving of historical facts and fiction
>Fast paced; hard to put down
>Well defined characters and story
>The history of Jerusalem's conquerors as told by the author, Nathan Erez, is fascinating to read

My favorite sentence in the book

"Jerusalem is one stubborn city that refuses to roll over and die."

Legion

tags: science fiction, supernatural, fallen angels, thriller

There is a SyFy channel series called Dominion which is loosely based on the 2010 movie Legion. I wanted to start watching it since I'm a huge follower of Supernatural TV series and I love the Winchester brothers, the angel Castiel, and the demon Crowley. I decided to see the movie first to get an idea of what the TV series would be. Ugh. Total waste of eyeball use and I nearly hurt myself for the constant eyerolling. 

Not recommended unless you have a fetish for open mouth acting, if that can be called acting.

Jeep's mouth is always open in every scene and angle

The eyeroll rating is for the subpar acting  that every character is guilty of and for the atrocious dialog. Jeep really riled me with his lame, always open-mouthed, looking like a retard, character. He's a fruit and a weakling who can't even handle any weapon to protect himself or anyone else. And what kind of name is Jeep anyway? I was wishing he'll be the first to die. Alas! Never happened. 

Enemy

tags: psychological thriller, mystery

I watched the movie twice, the second viewing merely 2 hours after the first viewing ended. First time I ever did that. The ending was so bizarre I said out loud "What does it mean?" repeatedly to myself. It was very puzzling, I kept reviewing in my mind the whole movie then decided to watch it again. It's streaming on Amazon free for Prime members anyway, and I had time to kill that day.

The movie stars one of my all-time favorite actors, Jake Gyllenhaal, and directed by Canadian Denis Villeneuve who directed my favorite movie of 2013, Prisoners, also starring Jake. Enemy is in the NEEDS MULTIPLE VIEWING TO FULLY UNDERSTAND OR APPRECIATE category, just like another of my JG faves, Donnie Darko. Enemy requires the viewer's full attention, from the first scene to the last, from meaningful dialog to seemingly insignificant but important scenes. Jake did an excellent job portraying two characters and the actress who played his wife is equally great. Her dialog, acting, and facial expressions gave me all the clues to what is really going on with the story.

Highly recommended to viewers who love to over-analyze psychocolgical thrillers.

If you haven't seen the movie, stop reading here because the following contains spoilers.

Snowpiercer

tags: dystopian, mystery, thriller

A post-apocalyptic ice age forces humanity's last survivors aboard a globe-spanning super train. One man (Chris Evans) will risk everything to lead a revolt for control of the engine and the future of the world.

For full plot, click on Wikipedia: 

Snowpiercer is a 2013 South Korean science fiction action film based on the French graphic novel Le Transperceneige by Jacques Lob, Benjamin Legrand and Jean-Marc Rochette. The film is directed by Bong Joon-ho, and written by Bong and Kelly Masterson. The film marks Bong's English-language debut; approximately 80% of the film was shot in English.The film stars Chris Evans, Song Kang-ho, Go Ah-sung, Jamie Bell, Ewen Bremner, John Hurt, Tilda Swinton, Octavia Spencer, and Ed Harris. 

I've been waiting for this movie since December 2013 when I first saw the trailer because I'm a die-hard fan of both South Korean and dystopian post-apocalyptic movies. I wasn't disappointed in this movie and I love it. To describe it in a few words, it's 1984 aboard a perpetually moving train. It's dark, bloody, and people get killed nonstop which is what dystopian movies are supposed to be. I specially love the character of Tilda Swinton as comedy relief. And true to South Korean dramas there is a very short scene of a buff [always] shirtless guy about to take a shower.

Once again, the Weinstein Company tried to butcher the movie for the benefit of the supposed to be stupid American moviegoers. How condescending! They acquired the rights to the movie but the release in North America was delayed because "he's-no-Einstein" Harvey Weinstein wanted 20 minutes of footage be cut. The director refused and succeeded in getting the film released uncut. I think the movie is still currently playing in theaters and also streaming on Amazon.