Coming to Netflix streaming.
Goose egg for the book
The trailer for the new Netflix adaptation is out on Netflix and I can't help but write a post on the terrible "reads like parody" laughable novel. No, the gamekeeper is not the hot guy shown by every Hollywood production. In the book Oliver Mellors is a sickly phlegmy skin and bones cough-a-minute guy with no sex appeal whatsoever. Oliver is henpecked by his termagant bully wife who left him and their 5 year old daughter. In the book the daughter appears just twice never to be heard of again.
After surveying his property, the invalid husband decides he needs an heir. He tells Lady Chatterley to find a lover, have a child with him, and they will make the child their heir. So yeah, the lady has permission to bed a guy other than her husband. But he doesn't want a lowly gamekeeper's child to be his heir and naturally does not approve of his wife's choice of lover and worries that she is falling in love with a worthless consumptive man.
Lady Chatterley and Oliver Mellors find they are attracted to each other over a cageful of chickens that he raises on the estate adjacent to the small cabin where he lives. Chickens! I was laughing so hard at that scene. I was embarrassed for the author. I'm not kidding.
The book was so controversial and banned in several countries at the time it was published because of the use of a four letter word and the sex scenes which to me are hilarious and ridiculous, exactly like Fifty Shades of Grey. These two lovers name their private parts John Thomas and Lady Jane and decorate them with flowers. They are loony to me, not sexy.
Lady Chatterley together with her sister as teenagers were encouraged by their parents to get "deflowered" by young boys when the family went on vacation to Italy or maybe France. Indeed they were, by 2 German boys. What the heck! Their parents! The 2 sisters are promiscuous as young adults and settled down after their marriage to suitable gentlemen.
So it is head scratching for Connie (Lady Chatterley) to marry a wheelchair bound guy knowing she cannot have sex with him. The author tried to show that she is attracted foremost by his intellect. HAHAHAHAHA. But of course, she previously cheated on her husband before she met the tuberculosis guy. She had sex with an associate of her husband's right there in their house when he visited. The business associate encouraged her to divorce Chatterley and run away with him. She insisted in staying with her "brainy" husband to help him finish a publication he is writing.
Then there's the Oedipus Complex thing happening between the nurse and the husband. What? She is there to get revenge on him but somehow she starts having maternal and sexual feelings for the invalid. Are you kidding me? It is sooooo stupid and yucky.
Then the novel suddenly shifts to politics and Oliver's fight for the coal miners' right. Huh? Alrighty then. He ignores his new born baby with Lady Chatterley the same way he has been ignoring his older daughter with his wife. He's too busy with social justice issues doncha know! Sheesh. What a great lover!!??
Please, stay away from the book and the Netflix special to keep your IQ points intact. You're welcome!
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